It's 2014 and yes a lot of things have changed, I mean women do construction work and I can open my own jar of pickles even if he's sitting on the couch but just how much have things changed and what is past the point of acceptable. Last week I saw a picture of a woman on one knee supposedly proposing to her then boyfriend, to say the least I was a bit shocked being raised in a black family there is a certain order to these things and for specific reasons, but as I mentioned before, it's 2014 and things have changed. But when is change too much? more so with regards to dating and marriage?
As men and women we obviously have different views on the topic so I took my select group of friends which is composed of both the male and female gender just to find out which way they sway. One of my very best friends said for her it's ok to flirt with a guy just to let him know you're interested but anything beyond that is mostly his role to initiate the actual relationship.. another who is also female says asking him out on a casual date and expressing interest in the subtlest manner possible. A "very" Zulu male friend on the other hand said there is nothing wrong with saying what you feel but to quote "who then pays the lobolla if she asks me to marry her? that's a bit much." Another male friend says he has no problem if a woman initiates as we are living in the 21st century but it still does not mean we should let go of our ways that we are accustomed to.
So it would seem that the majority is for women initiating relationships and another friend went as far as saying: "with the men we're living with nowadays we wouldn't get anything done if we waited around for men" and anyway one should never apologise for doing what they feel!!
By : Gugulethu